Fives Years and Another Day

i’ve often wondered
why has Life chosen
to give me the people
it has

is it my
Choice

or is it simply
Life

"what if all the things i've done
were just attempts at earning Love
cause the hole inside my heart is
stupid deep"

jon bellion said that
that was my “break up song”
i think i was just trying to decide
Life or Choice

now i wonder it again
but in a far different context
one i didn’t expect i’d ever know again
the First person

it seems rude to attribute
numbers but First has to mean
something
right

First a love

broken by my young dumb hands
Seconds a love
broken by other young dumb hands

and now after 5 years
another day to think
of the First
of Life or Choice

i still have dumbs hands
they simply have more hair
more scars
more tears on them

Life
Choice
i’m not sure which it is
that brought me here

i do think Love
regardless of the result
is more than emotion
or a feeling

not to say i believe in the one
but i find Love to be significant
and if i can
i’d like to not squander it

i don’t ask for promise
or trust
or much of anything
really

friendship would be nice